I don’t know about you but my foyer … my FOYER … it is a spot in our home that can quickly become the dumping ground for all the things we bring in and out in our daily routine.
If I am being honest, the VAN is actually what becomes the dumping ground for all this STUFF, but when the van get so cluttered that the boys are literally climbing over who knows what and momma bear loses her cool … that’s when the foyer takes the brunt of the mess.
Today is no exception.
Actually, today IS an exception in that – on top of the dump of cleaning out the van enough to load it again with what seems like a never ending supply of take-out containers, solo socks and boots, there are boxes upon boxes of books and bags of donations. Heaven forbid there be a fire in our home, we LITERALLY would not be able to get into the rec room (save the fact that said room has two massive sliding doors…)
I can ignore it for a while, I can pretend that it is just a season of life when things get a little hectic … I can try and lie to myself that it doesn’t bother me. But, if I am real with you – it PISSES ME OFF.
It starts a cycle of feeling overwhelmed as soon as I walk through the door, as soon as I traverse the mountain of winter wear, shoes, toys, and Perrier bottles to play with the boys in their space (or make it to my office).
By the time I manage to maneuver through the chaos without tripping or spraining my ankle *which is a FEAT when you are as jumbo preggo as I am*, I am so wound up and anxious that I know my veiled attempts at “accepting” this messy stage are just that … veiled attempts. And lightly veiled.
This is what it looks like today.
It all it’s dumping ground, we have to deal with this but not right now, glory.
It is chaos, and as much as it is just a stage and we are so proud of the work we have been doing to REDUCE the amount of STUFF we have (cue all the books, literally HUNDREDS of them) this mess makes me mad!
Mad, and sad.
Mad because it is A LOT of stuff, a lot of things that could have easily been put away properly when they were first used and done with (even so much as just being taken out of the van instead of discarded in the wasteland). Mad because it reminds me that, as much as we have been getting rid of the excess and working to cut back, there is still a LONG way to go to be living in a way that uses every item efficiently. Mad because it’s a lot that I have left until now, until the straw teeters on the camels back threatening to break it.
But sad because this is what my husband is coming home to after 13 hours of hard labour. After 13 hours of hauling trash from other people, he enters his castle and is bombarded with the crap and clutter that is trashing up OUR home. The boys can hardly greet him over the mess, I cautiously call down from the living room (trying my best to avoid taking in the overwhelming scene) and he, he just smiles and comes on it. He looks past it *I don’t know how*, and welcomes the boys with arms wide open, gives his exhausted wife a kiss and asks what’s for dinner.
Bless his heart, he has never mentioned the crazy. But I know, even if it doesn’t bother him, that it is better when he comes home to a welcoming foyer.
And that makes me sad.
*and here comes the kick in the pants – because we all need one now and then*
Here’s the thing, I can remain overwhelmed by the massive amount of things to sort though, to put away, to itemize or discard – OR – I can do something about it.
I can choose, today, to take small steps toward success and regain that welcoming foyer that I created a month and a half ago. One that has adequate space to remove and store the boys boots, to hang all the coats, sweaters, scarves and snow pants, one that begs people to “come on in” as opposed to terrifies them as they question whether this pile or that is safe to step on.
I can do something simple by breaking down the work into sections or tasks, creating space by moving out the boxes and bags of donations and then sifting through the random assortment of “goodies” that came in from the van, and I can get to fricken’ work.
Here’s the thing, and you hear it ALL.THE.TIME in every personal development book or motivational speech >> you have to do the work, no one is going to do it for you!
If you want something you have to be willing to work for it FIRST because there is no guarantee that someone else will consider it as necessary or annoying as you. Your husband may not love coming home to the wall of random at the front entrance, but he also may not care enough to do anything about it. So, if you wait for him to start, well … it may never get going.
You haver to start, you have to be willing to take baby steps if it’s all you can manage, to make the change you want to see.
Plain and simple.
So, start with me today. Find that area of overwhelm and start small, tackle a section, a similar item, tackle SOMETHING and take control of your home so you can stop blaming the STUFF for your being STUCK.
